An altered book...

that began over six months ago.  The thought behind it was the visualization of the "why I moved".  The decision was finalized by a toxic environment but began I believe with a trip to South Carolina over 10 years ago and a tour of the mountains of North Carolina with a friend.
The book uses one image created with citra solv a couple times because, though hard to see in the photos, shows a woman reaching out to an illusion of a girl in the distance.  That is the basis of the title "Illusions - A Fairy Tale".  As I began the monologue of the dream I searched for a definition of the word mortal.  And then I found the song "Wide awake and feeling mortal" by Kris Kristofferson.
He created the balance of the fairy tale.  The words that flow in his song so clearly defined the my being after the move.
The lyrics are:

Wide awake and feeling mortal
at this moment in the dream
That old man there in the mirror
and my shaky self-esteem

Here today and gone tomorrow
that is the way it's got to be
with an empty blue horizon
for as far as I can see

God almighty here I am 
Am I where I ought to be
I've begun to soon descend
like the sun into the sea.

And I thank my lucky stars
from here to eternity
for the artist you are
and the man you made of me.

Pretty speeches still unspoken 
perfect circles in the sand
rules and promises I've broken
That I still don't understand.

Sooner or later I'll be leaving
I'm a winner either way
for the laughter and loving
that I am living with today.

Due to space limitations, only including the cover photo and one page that has a vintage photo dated 1899.  I have uploaded photos of all pages {they are a tad rough...no editing...} and they can be viewed here: illusions - A Fairy Tale

I wish I could give credit to the person that wrote the quote on the back inside cover.  I clipped it from some article, somewhere, that defined my feelings:

     "I have learned that if you must leave a place that you have lived in and loved and where all your yesteryears are buried deep, leave it any way except a slow way, leave it the fastest way you can.  Never turn back and never believe that an hour you remember is a better hour because it is dead."

Comments

Unknown said…
Very moving book! Such a beautiful way to work through things!
thank you Karen...and sooo good to see you again !!!

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